Persevering Paige

The world of wedding planning is full of everything you should do—and shouldn’t—which can feel so overwhelming and confusing. I just wanted to share our experience so that somewhere, in a very small corner of the internet, there would be a blog post about wedding planning that just shared an experience with some explanation. If you find any shared experiences within my blog, I will be happy that I helped someone feel some form of connection.

My fiancé and I got engaged in May of 2022 and we get married next month (August ‘23). Essentially, I’ve had 2 full summers (I’m a teacher) and an entire year to plan our wedding. I knew I wanted time to plan a day that would make beautiful memories and reflect the love we share. I’m also a planner and I need to take my time. I despise being rushed. It’s also just the way it worked out with the vendors we wanted, etc.

I’m Catholic and my fiancé attends mass with me and has for a while, but he grew up Baptist. We are getting married in the Catholic Church, where we go together and started our faith journey as a couple. In the church, a couple preparing for marriage has certain steps to take before they can make their vows. We have had to take a survey and discuss the results over 2 sessions with our officiant (deacon). The questions covered important topics such as: finances, love and family, religion, disagreements, etc. When we met with our deacon, we got to hear how our answers aligned with our partner’s and then discuss the issues that did not align as much. Overall, my fiancé and I were close on almost everything. I really enjoyed the process of talking about important topics with a non-biased party there to assist. It was helpful to hear my fiancé’s thoughts. After our 2 sessions to discuss our survey results, the next step was to attend a 10 hour marriage retreat which we did 3 months later. It was such a wonderful experience. I’m so grateful for these steps we have had to take, but honestly, I think they were such a blessing. What I’m getting at, is that getting married in the church is a little bit of a longer preparation process.

Anyway, I didn’t realize how much went into wedding planning before I got engaged or even when I got engaged. There are so many moving parts—florist, reception venue, hair and makeup, dress/veil >>alterations, bridesmaids’ dresses, tuxedos, the cake, stationary, and logistics. I’m probably forgetting something else, but you get the point. Oh, the honeymoon. And the DJ. Oh and guest favors.

I could share what I did for all of those things, and I will, but I wanted to mention that I have researched a lot while trying to plan. I think everyone does. There are so many wedding blogs that tell people what they should do, and my wedding plans go against just about every single thing they say “not” to do.

For example, the blogs say to do a first look. “You absolutely should do a first look if you want your day to go smoothly”—well, we aren’t doing a first look. It’s not because we want to be rebellious, it’s really because we are both traditional and for as long as we both can remember, we have pictured our wedding day as seeing the bride/groom as we are walking down the aisle. I have absolutely no desire to see him before. I have read that it gives you a private moment before you are in front of everyone…well, we are literally driving to the reception together, so we will get our private moment then.

That’s another thing, they say to have everything at one location. They say not to spend your day in transit or between multiple locations. I get it. It’s easier, but it takes away from something really important—my religion?? I honestly can’t believe I even read that in a wedding blog. So no, if you have to have 2 locations for religious purposes, or you just simply want to, go for it! We are. I also feel like the first look makes zero sense if you have multiple locations like we do.

I have also seen the “don’t have a cash bar”…well, you guessed it. We are. Alcohol is a want, not a need!!! I’m so tired of the sentiment that that is what guests want. Untrue! I have a lot of friends and family members who are sober or who just don’t drink. My fiancé and I are paying for our wedding pretty much by ourselves. We aren’t going into debt to give our guests unlimited alcohol. We also aren’t banning it altogether. You can drink, just not on us. If you love us enough, you’ll be there.

Basically what I’m getting at is that you should do whatever the heck you want. It is your wedding. I only plan on having one, and I’m not about to make it what someone else wants (besides my fiancé, but we want the same things).

Cheers,

Paige

Oh and for my lovely vendors —we are in Virginia.

Florist- George’s Flowers

Photographer- Katie Jacobs Photography

Venue- St. Andrew’s Catholic Church/The Kyle House

Cake- Priceless Cups and Cakes

Dress- MoriLee Official purchased at Chantilly Lace Bridal in Blacksburg, VA (alterations done there too)

DJ- my stepdad (Eddie Roach)

HMUA- Zee’s Salon & Day Spa

Bridesmaids’ dresses & groomsmen ties- Azazie

Tuxedos- Men’s Warehouse